“The most important thing you manage is your own energy.”
Photo credit – pixabay via pexels.com
“The most important thing you manage is your own energy.”
Photo credit – pixabay via pexels.com
“It’s what we all wanted when we were children- to be loved and accepted exactly as we were then, not when we got taller or thinner or prettier…and we still want it… but we aren’t going to get it from other people until we can get it from ourselves.”
– Louise Hay
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“The privilege of a lifetime is being who you are”
– Joseph Campbell
Dr. Wayne Dyer once said, “You are always a valuable, worthwhile human being – not because anybody says so, not because you’re successful, not because you make a lot of money – but because you decide to believe it and for no other reason.”
You are worthy because you exist 🙂. You are enough just the way you. You are worthy just the way you.
Yes, there are people who judge you but if you look, you will see that they are people who are not feeling good (even before they met you that day) and are therefore, disconnected from who they are because of which they can’t love themselves (in the first place) and you, unconditionally at all times. Someone who is connected to his source (or inner being or inner self or soul or infinite intelligence etc. – people may call it different things but they are referring essentially to the pure positive non-physical part of us) predominantly and consistently feels good predominantly and consistently and therefore is able to love and appreciate himself and others predominantly and consistently. When you are feeling positive emotion, you want to appreciate, you want to compliment, you want to smile. When you are feeling negative emotion (it could range from irritation, frustration, being overwhelmed to anger, hatred, rage to powerlessness, despair, helplessness etc.), appreciation is something which does not occur to you because the vibration is so different from where you are at that time. It is the same with others too. We are all human.
Your source, on the other hand loves you and adores you all the time. There is this beautiful quote by Abraham Hicks – “If you were listening to the hypnotic voice of your Source, you’d be constantly hearing the drum beating that says, “You are loved, and you are worthy, and you are valued and life is supposed to be good for you. You are worthy, you are valued, you are loved and life is supposed to be good for you.”
You may want to choose as to whether you would like to listen to the people who are sometimes connected and sometimes disconnected (and therefore, sometimes approving of others and sometimes disapproving of others) or to your source (which is always there within you loving you and adoring you). You can get some glimpses of approval from others here and there and even though it does feel good when it happens, if you get addicted to approval from others (who are fickle and it’s okay…we are all human), you are giving up something really important for something which can be at best temporary. You always have a choice.
So, if you decide to listen to your source, how can you “feel” it? You can when you are thinking thoughts that make you feel relief, which make you feel better, which make you feel good, you are feeling the same feeling as that of your source. Your source is pure positive energy (and that is why you love feeling positive emotions because that is your essence) and when you both are feeling the same, you are connected.
Just want to add here that sometimes, many people judge themselves for feeling negative emotions and nothing will take you further from your source than judging yourself. Whenever you will judge yourself, you will always feel the punch in your gut (emotionally). Even though negative emotions are painful, they do have value. Positive and negative emotions are part of your inner guidance. Whenever you feel negative emotion, that is an indicator that you are thinking thoughts which are separate from your inner being, from your source and you can (through the power of your own focus and willpower) whenever you feel ready to, pivot to better feeling thoughts. Distraction can be extremely powerful in this. You can distract yourself to topics which are easy for you to appreciate and when feeling better and stronger, if you want to and feel ready to, you can focus on the topic which was painful in a way which gives you relief. Chances are high that because of the new and improved vibrational place that you are in, you will be able to look at what was painful in a way which makes you feel better about it.
A question can arise here – if I love myself where I am, does that mean that I will never want more, that I will never grow? Does being happy with myself just the way I am mean that I will be static? Not at all. You will want more. That is your essence but you can be “happy on your way to more” or you can be “unhappy on your way to more”. The choice is yours. Whatever you will be feeling predominantly and consistently (not always but predominantly and consistently) on your journey will determine how much and how easily you get what you want. Sharing another profound quote by Abraham Hicks here who say that the best place to be in vibrationally – “I am satisfied where I am and eager for more”.
Living predominantly and consistently in alignment with your source, with who you are is an extremely powerful place to be in – you are feeling joy, free, worthy empowered, passionate, thrill, ease, love, appreciation more often and isn’t that what you would like? You are of so much more value to yourself and to anyone else you would want to be of value to from this place of strength.
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“When I run after what I think I want, my days are a furnace of stress and anxiety. If I sit in my place of patience, what I want flows to me, and without pain. From this I understand that what I want also wants me, is looking for me and attracting me. There is a great secret here for anyone who can grasp it.”
When you prepare here (by being happy wherever you are), there (i.e. what you want) comes over here and it comes over here “easily”. This is different from you going over there to get what you want. This is not to say that do not offer action but action from a place of alignment (from a place of feeling good) is very powerful.
When you are feeling despair, you feel like offering a particular kind of action. When you are feeling anger, there is another kind of action which you feel like offering. When you are feeling hope, there is yet another kind of action which you feel inspired to offer and when you are feeling love and appreciation, there is yet another kind of action which you feel like offering. The action offered is important but more important is the vibrational place from where it is inspired.
First line up energy (by feeling good even though what you want hasn’t manifested) and then offer the action inspired from within you. You can offer action without lining up energy but the journey will be hard. Why make it hard when you can make it easy and also get the full potential of what you want? Why swim upstream when you can swim downstream (and hence enjoy the journey to what you want) and get the full potential of what you want (rather than a minuscule amount)?
This is very different from the thought that you must work hard, you must strive hard, you must sacrifice to get what you want, there is no gain without pain. That is one way of living/achieving what you want but not the only way. Choice is always yours.
I want to quote Abraham Hicks here – “You cannot have a happy ending to an unhappy journey.” You may find a solution at the end of an unhappy journey but it will be a mediocre one as compared to what you can manifest/ allow when you enjoy the journey to what you want. When you allow yourself to enjoy the journey by focusing on what makes you feel good predominantly and consistently, you allow the master solutions to be revealed to you as ideas, as impulses, as thoughts.
The frequency (i.e. the feeling or the vibration) of the problem and the frequency of the solution are different. In order to allow the solution to occur to you, being in its vibrational vicinity (i.e. feeling either the same or in the vicinity of feeling better which is what the solution will make you feel) will be of tremendous value. As Abraham Hicks say that the best vibrational place to be in – “I am satisfied where I am and eager for more”. I am feeling happy where I am and eager for feeling even more happy.
I want to add that instead of the word “patience” in the above quote, I would suggest the word “ease”. Feeling ease where you are. How do you feel ease when you don’t like a reality you are living, when it is so much in your face? You do so by going general into topics which are easy for you to appreciate. As you do this each day throughout the day, you will reach a place where you feel good more often. From this place of strength, chances are high that you will be able to look at something which was painful earlier is a way which gives you relief.
If you feel that you would like to and are ready to focus on something which was and/or is painful for you in a way which makes you feel relief – you can soothe yourself by telling yourself – “take a deep breath, relax, there there, it’s okay, things will get better, you have been in situations which were painful but you did come out if them so this too will be fine, all is well, there are people who are living the reality I want who were once in the same place that I am in, I am where I am and it’s okay” and similar statements. There is no right or wrong statement – just go by the relief it makes you feel. And before long, you will be feeling better. Be your own best friend.
A question can come up here – how much time will it take to feel better? The time taken will depend on two things – what you are feeling (i.e. your vibrations) and how committed you are to feeling better every day throughout the day.
As you soothe yourself and feel relief, you will walk toward feeling better. As you feel better more often every day, you will be walking towards feeling good more often. As you feel good more often, you will allow the law of attraction to match you up with all that you want because then you are in the same or similar vibration of your desire. You believe that once you have what you want, you will feel better. As you are feeling better now (even though what you want has not manifested), you allow the law of attraction to match you with all that you want in all it’s glory “easily”. The law of attraction is not saying that you feel good all the time but even if you can feel good 55% of the time every day, you would have managed a substantial difference to your vibrations and hence of what manifests in your life.
If not for anything else, just for the feeling of it, feeling better from wherever you are is worth a shot 🙂
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“You are not required to set yourself on fire to keep other people warm.”
The above reminds me of this very empowering quote by Abraham Hicks – “it is not your job to keep others happy and it is not their job to keep you happy”. It is your job to make yourself happy and it is their job to make themselves happy. Each one of us has the potential, the ability to feel happy through the power of our own focus, our thoughts much more than we give ourselves credit for. When you let yourself off the hook and let others off the hook too, can you imagine the deliciousness of that feeling? Two happy people savoring life coming together to further savor the awesomeness of the moments together. Can you imagine the power of that?
We are uplifters and it does feel good when we uplift others. When someone comes up to us and tells us that something that we did or said made him feel happy, we feel good. The problem arises when we start doing things for others in order for them to be happy and as time goes, we teach them to be dependent on us for their happiness. As they feel dependent on us for their happiness, their demands keep increasing and we keep giving even though we start feeling depleted. We have done two things – we have taught them to depend on us (rather than the power of their focus) and we have started resenting the very relationships we may have wanted to be of value to because now we feel we cannot give anymore. When we tell others that we cannot give anymore, more often than not they may react with anger because they are now used to getting their happiness from us. We may want them to have a different reaction. We may want them to understand where we are coming from but more often than not, this is not what we get from them in this situation.
We can’t control others (we may try and maybe we succeed with one person in the world but we can’t control them all and we do meet many people during our lifetime… trying to control them results in frustration) but we can control our thoughts. When we decide to focus on positive feeling thoughts, we allow the law of attraction to match us more with experiences which make us feel even more positive. As we practice our positive feeling thoughts throughout the day, every day, those who are around us either change to be a match to our new and improved vibrations or leave our experience and others take their place who are a match to our new vibrations. We start allowing the life experiences we desire.
Yes, it does require practice and initially, it may require gently guiding yourself to positive feeling thoughts. Feeling positive is not like a college degree that once you have it, it’s yours forever. Feeling positive is a choice you make every day, throughout the day. The suggestion is to be kind and gentle with yourself when starting to choose positive feeling thoughts over negative feeling thoughts. If you find yourself thinking negative feeling thoughts, that’s okay. You are human. The moment you are aware that you are thinking negative feeling thoughts, if you want, you can change them by distracting yourself to positive feeling thoughts. You can change your thoughts whenever you want. You never miss the bus.
Distracting yourself to “topics which are easy for you to appreciate” makes allowing more and more positive feeling moments easier on a daily basis. When you do this, that’s when you start allowing the life that you want to live – predominantly and consistently feeling positive. Anything that you want – more money, good health, a more nurturing relationship, a better career, starting a new venture, a bigger car etc. is all because you believe that you will feel better in the having of it. It is that feeling that you are targeting through that physical manifestation. If you can feel positive even though what you want has not yet manifested, what you want manifests “easily” in all its glory and the best part is that you “enjoy” the journey to living the physical manifestation that you want. That’s when you are “in the flow”. Athletes call it being in the zone. Musicians, athletes, authors, inventors, composers etc have long realized that unless they are in the flow, nothing flows.
Don’t do it for others. Do it for yourself. You can easily reconnect to your power, which was, is and always will be there for you within you.
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“We attract lovers from our level of energy. Take time to raise your vibration and attract from a higher vibration. If you want to live happily ever after, learn to manage your emotions and make joy the most important experience.
It’s ever so much more satisfying to get into a blissful place and attract a blissful person and live blissfully thereafter than to be in a negative place and attract a negative partner and then try to get happy from that negative place.”
– Abraham Hicks
If the question arises, how can I be happy? The answer lies in these simple and profound words by Joseph Campbell – “follow your bliss.”
When you follow what makes you feel relief, what makes your heart sing, what gives you joy, what makes you put a spring in your step predominantly and consistently – you feel good more often and therefore, are in a position of strength (rather than lack). You enable two things here – firstly, you feel what you want to feel (i.e. feel good) predominantly and consistently (not always but predominantly and consistently) and secondly, as a consequence of your feeling so, you allow the law of attraction to match you more with experiences which make you feel even more good. From this vibrational place of strength and feeling good, you are of so much more value to yourself and to anyone else you would want to be of value to.
As you practice your good feeling thoughts throughout the day, every day, more people who are a match to your new and improved vibrations come to you. The people in your life who are not a match to your new vibrations either change to become a match to your vibrations or if they can’t change, they leave.
Some people may say that even though I don’t feel good about this person, I don’t want him/her to leave my life. Chances are high that as you change your vibrations, the relationship which you are not happy with will change into what you want but just in case it doesn’t (some people are so far away from their alignment that they can’t raise their vibrations to meet yours…they are not ready, as of now and that is okay…we have our own beautiful individual journeys and what resonates with one person may not necessarily resonate with another) and you still don’t want the person to leave…in this situation, the question which you may want to ask yourself here is how much do you love yourself? This is worth thinking about.
As you continue feeling good, no matter what, chances are high that you will reach a place where if you feel like leaving the relationship, your decision of leaving would not be something which makes you feel discomfort of any kind. Instead of being a “moving away from” feeling, it will be a “moving towards something else or a coming home to” feeling. The action offered may be the same but the vibrational place it comes from (and hence what it feels like) would be different because you started allowing feel good moments, no matter what.
I must add here that suppose you are in a relationship with a person which you feel cannot be done away with like for example, you are divorced and do not have an amicable relationship with your ex-spouse but feel that you need to maintain the relationship because you have kids. If you have been practicing good feeling thoughts consistently and predominantly (either about your ex-spouse or about any other topic which is easy for you to appreciate) when you are “not” with your ex-spouse, he/she will rendezvous with you only in the moments (or on the days) when he/she is a match to your vibrations i.e. when he/she is also feeling good (and therefore, the experience/ interaction will be a good feeling one). The law of attraction will orchestrate that.
It is important to note here that even though you are practicing your new and improved vibrations predominantly and consistently, you may still meet that one person every now and then who makes it tempting for you to choose to have a knee jerk reaction but because you are practicing your new and improved vibrations throughout the day, every day, you will be able to regain your balance (or in other words, your alignment) much more easily than earlier. You will have good shock absorbers while moving through life. Another good news is that as you continue practicing your good feeling thoughts, the negative experiences reduce in their frequency. You can’t eliminate them as they have value but you can reduce them.
You may ask what value do negative experiences have? Negative experiences help inspire within you desires for what you want. Every topic has an unwanted and a wanted – sickness (unwanted) and health (wanted), poverty (unwanted) and prosperity (wanted), rude people (unwanted) and kind people (wanted) etc. Whenever you are in an experience which you do not want, there is a sharp desire which springs forth from within you for the wanted. You need this sharp, strong and clear desire in order to grow and expand beyond what you have been before that desire. Isn’t the desire for wellness heightened in you after a period of sickness as compared to before that sickness? The unwanted helps in sharpening our desires. As you allow your desires (by feeling good, no matter what), you manifest your desire and move/grow into a place better than where you were before that desire was born from within you.
You might ask, why do we have to grow? You do because that is the essence of your being. “More” is the essence of who you are. When you have a lot happening in your life, you may get overwhelmed but after some time of rest, you start getting bored and then you want more. Of course, we can all choose how much more – some want more as in roller coaster rides whereas some may want more as a trip to the beach. We all have the freedom to choose how much of the thrill do we want.
As you focus on the specifics of what you want (i.e. on how good what you want feels) or on topics which may not be connected with what you want but are easy for you to appreciate (and therefore, feel good which is the same feeling that you will feel when you get what you want), you allow the law of attraction to match you up with your desire because vibrationally you are same or in the vicinity. That is how you leverage the power of the universe.
You can try and achieve what you want from a place where you are focused more on what you do not want but it will be an arduous journey and what you achieve will be a minuscule portion of what you could have had you focused on your desire or on the vibration of your desire (i.e. had you lined up energy before offering the action inspired from that place of alignment). Why swim upstream when you can swim downstream and get the full potential of what you want? The former will give you solutions but they were be at best mediocre ones. The master solutions come when you are a vibrational match to your desires – i.e. you are feeling what you will feel once you are living what you desire (even though what you desire has not manifested yet). Thankfully, there are many ways to feel good (the same frequency/vibration/feeling of your desire) – meditation, napping (yes 🙂 ), a walk next to nature, indulging in a hobby, a warm relaxing bath, spending time with a supportive and trustworthy friend etc. You can choose whichever way resonates with you, whichever way gives you relief, whichever way makes you feel good. Any of these can lead to the feeling (on in the vicinity) of what you desire. You believe that once you have what you desire, you will feel better and if you can feel better right now, you allow your desire “easily” into your physical reality and the path to your desire is also a joyous path. The ideas and impulses which comes to you from this place of feeling good, the action which you feel inspired to offer are from a place of strength rather than from a place of lack. You are leveraging the power of the universe. You are allowing the energy which creates worlds to flow to you and through you and you are flowing it toward all that you want. This is a very powerful place to be in.
A question can arise here – what if you are in a relationship which is verbally or emotionally or physically abusive? My suggestion would be to consider leaving the relationship even if you have not found the strength to think better feeling thoughts while being in the relationship. When in a place where you feel safe and whenever you feel ready, you can choose to think about that relationship in a way which makes you feel relief. This relief is important because firstly, it will make you feel better (which is what you want) and that will help in making peace with what happened (I reiterate – only when you feel that you are ready to make peace) and secondly, as you feel relief, as you feel better, as you make peace, you allow the law of attraction to match you with more to feel better, with more of what that relationship helped inspire within you.
Sometimes, we leave a relationship but do not change our vibrations at any point and we find others who make us feel the same that we felt in that relationship that we left. We can change places and faces but if our vibration is the same (i.e. a negative feeling emotion with regard to a particular topic), we (without intending to) attract more people who make it easy for us to feel the same emotion that we felt in that earlier abusive relationship. So, it’s in our interest to make peace with something which gave us pain but my suggestion is to initiate making peace only when you feel ready to do so. How would you know that you are ready? When you are able to think about that topic which gave you pain in a way which is not that painful any longer.
If you have been focusing on topics which are easy for you to appreciate more often, if you have been creating more feel-good moments predominantly and consistently through ways which make you feel better, which give you relief, which give you joy, chances are high that because of the new and improved vibrational place you are in, you may find the strength to initiate making peace with a specific topic that was painful to you earlier. There is no right or wrong in this. Just go by what feels better to you, what soothes you, what makes you feel relief. It’s your own beautiful individual journey.
It starts with you and your commitment to feeling good. If you have not been feeling good with one or many topics in your life, initially thinking feel-good thoughts can seem like an effort but as you go along, it gets easier. Initially, you may be able to find only a few moments in a day where you are able to focus in a way which makes you feel better. As you go along, you can stretch these moments by focusing on topics which are easy for you to feel good about. Some days, you may find yourself going back to the start i.e. from where you began feeling relief but don’t worry, you never miss the bus. You can start again whenever you feel ready to do so. There is always hope. As times goes and you practice your good feeling thoughts more often throughout the day, every day, you will find it easier to create more feel-good moments. The easier it gets, the easier it gets. The law of attraction is not saying that you feel good all the time. Even if you can feel good 55% of the day, every day, you would have made a substantial difference in your vibration and hence of what comes to you.
You start living as you intended to live – “free” and “joyously” “ever expanding” beyond what you have been before. You reconnect to your worthiness. As I wrote, it all starts with you and your commitment to feeling good.
“Your happiness is the most significant contribution that you could make. In your reaching for happiness, you are opening a vortex which makes you an avenue for the Well-being to flow through you. And anything that is your object of attention under those conditions, benefits by the infusion of your Well-being.”
– Abraham Hicks
Excerpted from: Boston, MA on October 10, 1999
Esther (and Abraham and Jerry)
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“Don’t worry if someone doesn’t like you. Most people are struggling to like themselves.”
When you expect love from people who are not even loving themselves in the first place, it’s like expecting a loan from someone who does not have money. Knowing this helps in feeling relief when you meet someone who doesn’t like you. This is not to justify but to understand and understanding is important in order for you to move on without negative emotion.
Some people may say “no! people who do not like me do love themselves. I do see them laughing and having fun”. Firstly, you have no means of knowing how they truly feel within. Secondly, you must understand that when someone loves himself/ herself, from that place of love and strength, whoever has the benefit of laying their eyes on this person feels that love if he/she is in the vibrational vicinity. From this place of feeling love and feeling good – you want to appreciate, you want to smile, you want to pass compliments, you have a spring in your step, you feel good, you feel ease, you feel joy, you are kind and gentle with yourself and with others. From this empowered place, you are of so much value to yourself and to others you want to be of value to.
So, when you love yourself, it’s easier to feel love for others too.
Even if you choose not to move away from someone who does not love you, understanding this will help in feeling better when with such people or while thinking about such people. In addition to focusing in this way, distracting yourself to topics which are easy for you to appreciate also helps in feeling better. It’s important to feel better because firstly, that is what you want. You want to feel better. Everything that you want in your life – better health, more money, better career, starting a new venture, a more nurturing relationship etc. is because you believe that you will feel better in the having of it. It is that feeling that you are targeting. Looking at a situation in a way which makes you feel relief, allows you to feel better in the first place (which is what you want) even though the situation may not have changed. You reconnect to your freedom – freedom from negative thoughts.
Secondly, as you feel better predominantly and consistently (irrespective of the situation you are in), you allow the law of attraction to match you up with more to feel even more better about. Your physical reality changes to be a match to your new, improved, predominant and consistent vibrations about a topic which earlier used to be painful to you. That is when you start living as the creator that you intended to be – creator of your life experiences. You reconnect to your power.
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